Why Dick Brodhead is a GENIUS

30 Jan 2009, Posted by Ade Sawyer in Ade Sawyer, Backpages, 0 Comments

You might remember that last summer President Richard Brodhead ( or Dicky B as he’s known in my head) signed on to the Amethyst Initiative; a group of college and university presidents which hopes to encourage debate on the drinking age.  Naturally, all of us at the Chronicle loved it.  And, of course, there were haters.

As it turns out though, Dicky B wasn’t just acknowledging the futility of the current law.  He was also preparing us for life.  You’re skeptical?  I’ll prove it.

Enter Obama.  On Wednesday, after the House passed the stimulus bill, President Barack Obama (hold on, savor that…President…Obama…) invited congressional leaders to the White House for drinks.  There’s a great article on Slate.com that talks about the virtues of presidential drinking.  Here’s a Cliffnotes version:

• This represents a move toward bipartisanism because drinking loosens people up so they can relax and stop being so adversarial.
• George W. Bush, due to alcoholism in earlier life, didn’t drink in the White House.  Yet another reason why he was America’s Debbie Downer.
• The founding fathers liked to drink.
• A lot of presidents liked to drink.
• FDR loved to drink.
• Nixon liked to drink too, but he had an alcohol problem (check clip 4, “Fiercest Adversary”).
• Congresspeople used to love drinking, but they’re scared to drink now because they’re afraid they’ll get photographed.  Instead they just exercise a lot.
• Drinking, although fun, won’t cure all of Congress’ partisan ills.
• Sidebar: There’s this thing for drunk-emailers called Mail Goggles.

While I have to reluctantly admit that drinking can’t make everything better…at least not long-term, it’s worth thinking about the fact that drinking is both a cause and a result of the social familiarity that can make it much easier for people to work together.  Duke students, the CCI committee and Dicky B have been clear on the power of alcohol as a social lubricant for some time.  Genius. Washington is just rediscovering it.

Duke is developing the next generation of people who will solve the world’s problems.  Or make tons of money off of them (I-Bankers…).  Either way we’re going to have to deal with people, and it can’t hurt to grease the wheels a little.  Listen to Dicky B and the president.  They know what they’re doing.

Get some practice this weekend!  (If you’re of age of course. Anything else is illegal.)

A Barack Obama Mad-Lib!

21 Jan 2009, Posted by Jacob Wolff in Backpages, Jacob Wolff, 4 Comments

One of the obvious problems with any form of journalism is the much-dreaded deadline. With a printed newspaper there needs to be time for the newspaper to be, well, printed. Even bloggers have deadlines, as our posts need to go through editors just as printed columns do. Thus… I come to my dilemma. You’re reading this on a day where you can finally say “Barack Obama is the President of the United States of America.” I, on the other hand, am writing it at a time where that statement isn’t true; I’m still dealing with Bush here in the distant past.

So today (your today), everyone is probably in an Obama-induced madness, and I don’t want a silly deadline to leave me out of the party. So I have decided that the best way to manage this is for you to help me write a timely article by engaging in a Barack Obama Inauguration themed Mad-Lib.

For those unfamiliar with a Mad-Lib (what were you doing all your childhood?!), grab a pen and some paper and write down one of each of the following words. For instance, for “plural noun,” you can put cats, hangnails, hermit crabs named Steven or anything else that tickles your fancy. Fill in the corresponding blanks in the story below after you’ve come up with all the words, and a hilarious/ enthralling one of a kind story ensues. It works best in pairs, so grab a friend and get going:

(Your name) (adverb) (plural noun) (verb ending in –ing) (verb ending in- ing) (number) (plural noun) (adjective) (number) (article of clothing) (muscular portion of Barack’s hot bod) (another article of clothing) (name of curious monkey) (another word for “shrubbery”) (adjective) (plural noun) (name of CNN correspondent) (name of overzealous Obama friend) (any generic female liberal Hollywood celebrity) (another generic female liberal Hollywood celebrity) (adjective) (type of sandwich)

Barack Obama’s Inauguration—By (your name)

Yesterday, Barack’s Obama’s inauguration went very (adverb). There sure were a lot of (plural noun) there! Everyone was (verb ending in –ing) and (verb ending in- ing)! There had to be at least (number) of (plural noun) there! Obama’s speech was really (adjective). He mentioned “change” (number) times.

Though his speech was good, my favorite thing was his (article of clothing), it really fit his (muscular portion of Barack’s hot bod) very well! We were all happy nobody threw (another article of clothing) at Barack. I was a bit surprised when (name of curious monkey) (another word for “shrubbery”) covered his eyes while hiding in the Oval Office under his desk in the hopes that nobody would see him and he could then stay president! When Obama walked him to his departure ceremony, Bush looked very (adjective). It got awkward though when Obama called him out for stealing (plural noun) from the White House supply room. Almost as awkward as when (name of CNN correspondent) praised Obama so much, it felt like he was hitting on him via newscast. Not nearly as awkward though as when my friend (name of overzealous Obama friend) drunkenly started to make out with the TV screen, though we all saw that one coming!

It was a good thing Vice President Dick Cheney didn’t turn into a 50-foot gorilla and scream: “You want to close (place where the U.S. takes away people’s Constitutional rights via torture), then I will take away your beloved (any generic female liberal Hollywood celebrity) even though she is essentially no different than (another generic female liberal Hollywood celebrity),” proceeding to snatch her from the crowd and climb the Empire State building as anticipated. All in all, the consensus was, it was a really (adjective) day. Oh yeah, also, I like a good (type of sandwich) every now and then.

The End!

If yours turned out particularly silly, put it in the comments… Sorry for pointing you in one particular direction at a few places

I sure hope you put a word such as “good,” “amazing,” “historic” or even “hairy” (for giggles) into that second to last spot… Welcome to the White House, Barack.

The Inauguration in Legos

19 Jan 2009, Posted by Andrew Hibbard in Playground, 0 Comments

Courtesy VALERIE MACON/AFP/Getty Image

If you can’t be in D.C. for Obama’s inauguration, Carlsbad, Ca. isn’t a bad option. At Legoland, they have recreated the inauguration in Legos. I wish I was this talented with Legos when I was 10. For more images of Legoland’s inauguration and general inauguration photos, check the Boston Globe’s excellent photo blog, The Big Picture.

The Real Stimulus Plan

18 Jan 2009, Posted by Andrew Hibbard in Playground, 0 Comments

Courtesy: www.jeremyinc.com/

(Via Salon) Just because you are not braving the DC cold to witness Obama’s historic inauguration doesn’t mean you can’t have the 44th president right in your home. He can be in your kitchen, playroom, bedroom, even your bathroom! That’s right, that’s a photo of Barack Obama on a roll of toilet paper.

You can read about all of the Obama paraphernalia–from the expected commemorative plates to the shocking–over at Salon:

OK, so, the Obama dildo looks about as titillating as stuffing a carved zucchini up your cha-cha (who knows? could be grand!). But I have a funny feeling that whoever is actually shelling out $34.95 for this bad boy isn’t investing in their sex life as much as their curio cabinet. It’s a measure of the richness of our great nation that we can memorialize the election of our 44th president in such a multiplicity of ways: For some, there is the Historic Victory plate (touting “his confident smile and kind eyes”); for others, there is a waterproof dildo that brags, “Make this an election erection to remember!”

Yikes.

CBC Listeners

16 Jan 2009, Posted by Andrew Hibbard in Playground, 0 Comments

The Canadian Broadcasting Corporation is preparing an inauguration-day gift for President-elect Barack Obama. It’s called “49 Songs from North of the 49th Parallel.” The CBC has an extensive list of tracks for Canadians to vote on. The list includes the likes of the Band, Joni Mitchell, Neil Young and Ameri-Canadians Arcade Fire. 

“One of the best way to know Canada is through the depth and breadth of our artistic expression,” says Denise Donlon, Executive Director, CBC Radio. “We’re excited about the new President and we want him to be excited about us, so we’re asking our audience to help compile the list of our most definitive Canadian songs!”

The 49 songs receiving the most votes will be played on Jan. 20 honoring Obama’s inauguration.

(Hat tip: BBC)