Debating FML

08 Apr 2009, Posted by Jacob Wolff in Backpages, Jacob Wolff, 4 Comments

One of the benefits of writing a blog is that you get to address issues you wouldn’t normally be able to in print.  The fact is, it’s the Internet, most anything goes.  So with this post I decided to engage in a debate on the merits of the (in)famous site known as Fmylife.com.

For those of you who are unfamiliar with the site, Fmylife.com is sort of like JuicyCampus or PostSecret in that people submit short, anonymous messages.  The posts are about extremely bad /embarrassing events that happened to the person, all of which end with the phrase ‘FML’ (short for F My Life).  For instance, one example of a typical post is: Today, my boyfriend told me he couldn’t hang out with me because he felt really sick. I went to his house anyway to surprise him with homemade soup. I walk in to his room only to find him hooking up with my sister. She can’t drive, our mom drove her there. FML.

The site has become all the rage for youngsters these days, to the point where saying “FML” is basically synonymous with “Wow, my life totally sucks.”  So I invited some (fictitious) experts to the blog to discuss the topic of Fmylife.com.  With us today we have world-renowned FML expert, Dr. Rusty Bumper, as well as a woman we randomly plopped off the street with promises of a job interview and free Subway, mother of 3, Negative Nancy.

Interviewer:  Let’s get some opening statements from you two, Dr. Bumper, let’s start with you…

Dr. Bumper:  Thanks.  First off, I’d just like to start I love your blog.  Your piece on single, 50 year old, sad, lonely men who still with their parents and enjoy creepily reading sites intended for teenagers really hit home with, uhhm, a friend of mine.  But moving on to FML, I just want to say it’s a great site.   It’s just flat out hilarious.  Whenever you need a pick me up, it’s the perfect “pity” site to make you realize “at least I don’t have it that bad!”

Nancy:  I’d first like to say I have no idea what I’m doing here. I was told this was a job interview and there would be free sandwiches.  But what the hay, I’ll go with it.  As a mother of two beautiful children and one other one that’s actually kind of weird looking, I decided to look at this FML to see what my kids were talking about.  Let me just say I’m outraged.  As an overprotective parent, I’m obligated to point out that it’s extremely vulgar.  But what really grinds my gears is that it’s ridiculous how unbelievable they all are!  I mean, should I really believe that some kid’s parents walked in on her while she was in bed with her Tyrannosaurus Rex boyfriend?  An herbivore dinosaur, maybe, but a T-Rex, come on now that’s just silly, he’d devour her.

Dr. Bumper:  Nancy, who cares if they’re made up?  All that’s important is that they make us realize no matter how bad things are, it could be worse.  For example, last week, my mom walked into my basement room and caught me re-enacting Britney Spears’ “Baby One More Time” video while simultaneously crying because the DVR didn’t record the Battlestar Galactica series finale.  What did I do?  I hopped on FML and immediately my self-loathing was replaced with girlie giggles.  Incidentally though I was still wearing my Britney skirt, and my mom was still in the room; but FML fixed that embarrassment up in jiffy!

Nancy:  I’m sorry; I just can’t take anything on there seriously, especially now that I know you wrote at least half of them.

Dr. Bumper:  Oh Nancy, you’re such a joker.  Seriously though, if you don’t find FML comical, as a doctor, I ought to see if you still have a funny bone!

Interviewer:  Aren’t you a podiatrist?

Dr. Bumper:  Thanks man, way to call me out on that one.  Not cool.  I’m posting this FML.

Interviewer: Some psychologists have criticized the site, saying it can be bad for people to constantly describe themselves in such a negative light.  Others questioned the morality of making money off people’s sadness like this.  Any response?

Nancy:  I’m gonna take this one rather than let the podiatrist have a crack at it,  the Doctor is clearly not right in the head.  I suppose when all is said and done, it’s a generally harmless site, especially seeing as many are probably made up.  Plus the rest seem to be in good humor.  As per making money off people’s sorrow, if that was against the law, Death Cab for Cutie would have been behind bars years ago.

Interviewer:  So do you think FML is just a passing fad, or is it here to stay?

Dr. Bumper: In my professional opinion, it will probably go the way of the Dodo bird, in that 17th century explorers will expose it to invasive predators and it will eventually go extinct.

Nancy/ Interviewer: *exchange confused looks*

Interviewer:  On that note, this concludes our interview.  Now if you really are having a bad day, I suggest you check out Fmylife.com (as it is funny) or watch this video, which always brightens my day (though it’s painful to watch, I read he went on to actually work as a sportscaster):

The launch

07 Apr 2009, Posted by Justina Wong in Backpages, Cartoon, 0 Comments

Vin Diesel: action star (again?)

07 Apr 2009, Posted by Braden Hendricks in Backpages, Braden Hendricks, 0 Comments

Here’s some news that will surely shock snobby film critics everywhere: Vin Diesel has made a successful action movie. It’s an occurrence as rare as a celestial event, so I’d like to take some time and comment on it.

First of all, let me excuse that chomping sound you are no doubt hearing right now- that’s me eating my words. You see, I all but swore that Vin Diesel’s action days were done, a statement that seemed only reinforced by last year’s debacle Babylon A.D. After I reviewed that movie for The Chronicle, I figured to myself there’s no way Diesel can return to his Pitch Black and xXx days.

Remember this?

I thought that it was unlikely he could even rekindle that Saving Private Ryan spark, or even the mojo he had in the very first (if you can remember back that far) fast and furious movie. Which was The Fast and the Furious. As opposed to 2 Fast 2 Furious. Diesel’s latest effort, the more simply titled Fast and Furious, seems to prove that Diesel is still a bankable action hero (or antihero, as the case usually turns out to be).

But part of me is resistant to all of this. Maybe it’s just pride messing with me, but I’m not entirely sure this qualifies as a full action comeback. On the one hand, Fast and Furious has set the record so far this year for opening weekend proceeds at the box office, with $72.5 million. Not only that, according to this article, this figure marks the biggest weekend opening in April, ever. On the other hand…it it is not only the fourth part of a franchise, it is basically a different version of the first movie. It has the same actors as the first movie, and the plot revolves around the same basic idea: a racing rivalry between Vin Diesel and Paul Walker while they get involved with hot women. We’ve, literally, seen this all before.

What are the implications of this film’s success then? Is Vin Diesel in fact an action star reborn? Does history in fact repeat itself so accurately after only eight years (when the first fast and furious film came out) And if that is the case, will, say, the Republicans reclaim the White House eight years from now? Okay, maybe that last is taking things a little too far….

Maybe its just that folks today are eager to be reminded of kinder days. When The Fast and The Furious came out, we were riding the coattails of the largest economic boom in American history. 9/11 hadn’t happened yet, and Bush had been in office a mere five months.

Still, I’m not convinced Vin Diesel is the bankable action hero he tries to be. For that to happen, a few more movies with the kind of success Fast and Furious has enjoyed so far need to be made. Because it’s going to take at least that much to erase the memory of this:

The ivory tower

06 Apr 2009, Posted by Gwen Gettliffe in Backpages, Cartoon, 0 Comments

Why I’ll be fluttering soon

03 Apr 2009, Posted by Ade Sawyer in Ade Sawyer, Backpages, 1 Comments

So today I came across this video on Slate.com by way of Twitter:

Obviously, everybody’s been talking about Twitter lately.  People love it, hate it, are thoroughly confused by it, etc.  If you think about it, all those different reactions make sense, seeing as Twitter is really just an aggregated thought stream.  That is, a stream of a bunch of different people’s thoughts all thrown together in chronological order.  I figure, people’s normal thoughts cause all those reactions (see the comments on any Chronicle article), so why shouldn’t a thought stream?

For a while I didn’t really get it either, and I’ll admit I still don’t get it completely.  But if it’s really just a collection of human thoughts, the fact is, none of us ever really stands a chance of “getting” it any more that we “get” the other ~6 billion people on the earth.  But we do it anyway because somewhere in the mix we get the satisfaction of interacting with other people, even if it’s just by way of electrons.

Many people will say that it takes a level of self-importance that borders on narcissism to think that people want to follow your thoughts and opinions (and yes, I get the irony of saying that as a blogger/columnist…blolumnist…I like it).  But on the other hand, it’s a pretty organic system, and it doesn’t really matter what your assumptions are about yourself, because only other people can confirm them.  Which is why I have 11 followers, while Rainn Wilson (Dwight from “The Office,” who I follow) has over 340k followers (a little cultish, no?) and thousands of people were disappointed this week to find out that Christopher Walken’s twitter feed was a fake.

At the end of the day, Twitter just gives people what they want: People…in bite-sized portions of 140 characters or less.  And whenever somebody finds another effective way to distribute people to people, their product will take off too.  It won’t matter whether it’s Flutter or Shttr (<<you’ll only get that if u watched the video) and most of us won’t “get it.”

On a related note, shameless self-promotion here.