A Barack Obama Mad-Lib!

Jan 21 2009, Written by Jacob Wolff in Backpages,Jacob Wolff, 4 Comments

One of the obvious problems with any form of journalism is the much-dreaded deadline. With a printed newspaper there needs to be time for the newspaper to be, well, printed. Even bloggers have deadlines, as our posts need to go through editors just as printed columns do. Thus… I come to my dilemma. You’re reading this on a day where you can finally say “Barack Obama is the President of the United States of America.” I, on the other hand, am writing it at a time where that statement isn’t true; I’m still dealing with Bush here in the distant past.

So today (your today), everyone is probably in an Obama-induced madness, and I don’t want a silly deadline to leave me out of the party. So I have decided that the best way to manage this is for you to help me write a timely article by engaging in a Barack Obama Inauguration themed Mad-Lib.

For those unfamiliar with a Mad-Lib (what were you doing all your childhood?!), grab a pen and some paper and write down one of each of the following words. For instance, for “plural noun,” you can put cats, hangnails, hermit crabs named Steven or anything else that tickles your fancy. Fill in the corresponding blanks in the story below after you’ve come up with all the words, and a hilarious/ enthralling one of a kind story ensues. It works best in pairs, so grab a friend and get going:

(Your name) (adverb) (plural noun) (verb ending in –ing) (verb ending in- ing) (number) (plural noun) (adjective) (number) (article of clothing) (muscular portion of Barack’s hot bod) (another article of clothing) (name of curious monkey) (another word for “shrubbery”) (adjective) (plural noun) (name of CNN correspondent) (name of overzealous Obama friend) (any generic female liberal Hollywood celebrity) (another generic female liberal Hollywood celebrity) (adjective) (type of sandwich)

Barack Obama’s Inauguration—By (your name)

Yesterday, Barack’s Obama’s inauguration went very (adverb). There sure were a lot of (plural noun) there! Everyone was (verb ending in –ing) and (verb ending in- ing)! There had to be at least (number) of (plural noun) there! Obama’s speech was really (adjective). He mentioned “change” (number) times.

Though his speech was good, my favorite thing was his (article of clothing), it really fit his (muscular portion of Barack’s hot bod) very well! We were all happy nobody threw (another article of clothing) at Barack. I was a bit surprised when (name of curious monkey) (another word for “shrubbery”) covered his eyes while hiding in the Oval Office under his desk in the hopes that nobody would see him and he could then stay president! When Obama walked him to his departure ceremony, Bush looked very (adjective). It got awkward though when Obama called him out for stealing (plural noun) from the White House supply room. Almost as awkward as when (name of CNN correspondent) praised Obama so much, it felt like he was hitting on him via newscast. Not nearly as awkward though as when my friend (name of overzealous Obama friend) drunkenly started to make out with the TV screen, though we all saw that one coming!

It was a good thing Vice President Dick Cheney didn’t turn into a 50-foot gorilla and scream: “You want to close (place where the U.S. takes away people’s Constitutional rights via torture), then I will take away your beloved (any generic female liberal Hollywood celebrity) even though she is essentially no different than (another generic female liberal Hollywood celebrity),” proceeding to snatch her from the crowd and climb the Empire State building as anticipated. All in all, the consensus was, it was a really (adjective) day. Oh yeah, also, I like a good (type of sandwich) every now and then.

The End!

If yours turned out particularly silly, put it in the comments… Sorry for pointing you in one particular direction at a few places

I sure hope you put a word such as “good,” “amazing,” “historic” or even “hairy” (for giggles) into that second to last spot… Welcome to the White House, Barack.